Over the line, can't define what I'm after.

I want to go home.

Even though I thought I'd never think those words, there's always moments when one can surprise oneself. Right now, in my very independent life, I surprise myself; I miss home and would much rather be there than here.

Really, I'd rather be almost anywhere other than here and my reason behind such a statement is purely this: I. Hate. School.
I am not a student. I make a very poor student. Even though I made Honor Roll for my grade 12 year and have proven that I can get decent marks when I work hard, I lack the motivation to work at my studies. I am at the top of the charts when it comes to procrastination. Honestly, I don't do shit when it comes to homework. It's really quite pathetic.

College hasn't been looking good on me, either, even though I am on the cross country team. My eating habits are quite horrible and it's been showing. I really don't want to gain the famous freshman 15 at all, but it's looking like I will if I don't change how I'm eating. The drinking probably doesn't help at all. The amount of beer I've drunk in the past two weeks is kind of disgusting. I'm thinking about maybe going for a small run in the early morning and then practice in the afternoon. Of course, I'll have to start getting a proper amount of sleep as well, I know that essential to losing weight too.
It's gross, I know I should be eating healthy; my coach tells me I should be eating healthy, but then I go and I buy ICE CREAM and COOKIES. I'm going to be throwing those out this morning. I did buy a bunch of bananas and grapes and yogurt though.. I'll have to start munching on those instead of the sugary foods.
Argh. I need to go purchase a weight scale.
It also sucks that when I get the munchies, I can't really just go outside and take a walk instead of running to get something sugary to eat. The house I live in has a security alarm so every time you open the door and close the door, you hear a beeping sound. Plus the door is kind of creaky. I don't think my landlord would like it if she heard that late at night when she's trying to fall asleep. I wish I lived in residence for that reason..

I don't want to go to school today, but I skipped out yesterday and missed a quiz and failed to hand in a geology lab that I hadn't even started. Smooth move, Rachel, smooth.

Rachel